Yo, what do you get If you cross a bird and a mole? No, this isn’t a joke It’s legit how we roll We’re the Crossbreed Labs Such a wild diverse crew We got more creature types Than a Multiverse zoo!
So have a seat, watch your feet, the things you’ll meet just can’t be beat! We got Rhino-Rats, Pony-Bats, Octo-Gnats, and Ninja-Cats Raccoon-Hawks, Squirrel-Fox, an Ogre-Ox that really rocks Hydra-Hare, Spider-Mare, and Dragon-Bear (you shouldn’t stare)
Now please put on your lab coat And come meet your professor He’s a Dino-Fish-Bird-Goat I trust that won’t be a stressor Dr. Jumblemorph knows How to splice race and class So figure out how that goes If you’re hoping to pass
We’re Bablovia’s best Out of all five factions We’ve got the coolest moves And the friendliest actions
So now come Gimme Five And join us in a toast We hope you’ll Augment our team ‘Cause we’re happy to Host!
Who’s next?!
Apologies, pix won’t currently save. —-
The Order of the Widget
Best in any situation.
We’re ranked by intelligence
Up to our highest station.
[Grand Calcutron]
We get a lot of attachments
So we may be less photogenic
But regardless of your problem
The answer is a prosthetic.
[Knight of the Kitchen Sink]
We have Widget Contraption
A Von Neumann machine
We’ll remake you step by step
Because who really needs a spleen?
[Widget Contraption]
Now people say we’re rigid
And have no sense of humor
But I’m including a limerick
That’s antithetical to that rumor
[Rules Lawyer]
A man from the Order of Widget
Had an uncomfortable fidget
He claimed they were the worst
So to stop the outbursts
He removed all his limbs like a nidget.
LOVE IT!!
Who’s next?!
*DUNNN-DAH-DA-DUN*
HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAH!
*DUNNN-DAH-DA-DUN*
Oh this will be fun
Greetings all you worthless peons, welcome to my evil lair I’d tell you “have a seat,” but I’ve strapped you to my DOOM CHAIR! Nothing you can do as my evil plan unfolds, So I’ll monologue (as long as that new fancy metal strap holds).
I’m a simple man with a very small desire: To rule this world and raze it in a MASSIVE BLAST OF FIRE! My super-duper death ray (once it cranks to overdrive) Will run you through, your goblins too, and even after 5 more ones, you’ll find this bundle of fun and guns has just begun 4 there’s no one who gets it done like me – this ain’t no hit-and-run!
Submit! You’ll wish you were permitted to live by my rules Here’s a nasty wake-up call: DOOM HAS NO SNOOZE BUTTON, FOOLS! You’ll just have to ask yourself, is it really worth the fight? Live under me, or die 3 (trust me, you’ll be dead alright)
Not 2 prattle on like this, but you don’t have much time to go, The second hand keeps ticking and I don’t want you to miss the show WATCH THIS WORLD CRUMBLE! Join me or YOU’RE DONE! But do make a decision:
Although it felt like forever I’ve bided my time By design You think your rhymes are clever But mine you’ll find are sublime
Explosioneers can sneer about their rigger of the week But their defeat will be bleak Served by THE AGENTS OF S.N.E.A.K.
Sly spies who prize a disguise Masters of lies and surprise Sowing suspicion and division On every mission to high-five
When our contraptions see action Against the CrossBreed Labs They’ll be cranked up into traction While the Clocknapper Dabs
Masterful Ninja will injure On swamps and islands with no border Our Dispatcher coming at ya Catch her dissin’ the Order
Phoebe is head of the Agents a team of ladies and gents that dispense with the cloak and put their dagger in your vents
We have the nicest devices To snoop and find out your vices Leaving behind those beginners With little widget fidget spinners
While you cattle simply prattle I’ll be singing Hallelujah And if you’re looking for a battle X is gonna give it to ya
Load of goblins make up us
And contraptions too
The Explosioneers, we bust
Out a rhyme as we clatter and choo
Our Steamflogger boss is new on the job
Cranking new sprockets and assembling more
A fancy rhyme he shouts as my hammer does bob
Our time we spend building sure doesn’t bore
In due time, our problems will fix
Though three heads leads to a fight
Our work is sure, and other sure get a kick
My only problem is my ear in his bite
A wager and gamble on the other thumb you may roll
But, undeniably, it is the best charm for a goblin, albeit less so for Krark
Now soon your punishment will be doled
And let’s hurry, before it gets dark
Ol’ Buzzy, our chief-chopper-of-trees
As he risks bigger and wider when it’s his turn to bat
Being care to avoid all chance of Bee-bees
Wreaking havoc with dice, soon enough that we may need a new hat
Rolling for horses and wearing hard hats
Flinging booms and auto thwacking with hammers
Our job is our life, I’ll give it that
Work sure is tough, just hope I don’t bam yer (thumb)
These rhymes are all cute But now please don’t get enraged When you factions realize You’re about to be upstaged While you’ve been building Contraptions And showing up early The real power is here That makes Bablovia squirrelly
We replaced the white mice When their population dwindled To escape the same fate Our evolution was kindled Now we’re stronger and faster And most importantly smarter So we’ve started a union And we all signed the charter
You five little factions All squabble and bicker And meanwhile our plans Just couldn’t be slicker We stay behind the scenes You think we’re gathering nuts But what we gather is power Enough to kick all your butts
So just stay out of our way And keep pretending you rule You’re so much more useful As an unwitting tool We’ll keep Bablovia running While each of you fails To keep up with our brilliance And our soft bushy tails
magicpotatolover 